20 Humorous (But Painfully True) Reasons NOT To Write Your Book This Year
I’m no comedian, but the other day, I was thinking about all the reasons people give me for not writing the book they say they want to write.
It led me to come up with this list of tongue-in-cheek reasons mixed with a smattering of truth. I enhanced each one with a bit of “Yvonne” commentary that could turn your ideas about writing a book around this year.
Strategic Insights Behind the Humor
- You hate social media. 🙁 Don’t we all!
Social media is just a tool in your marketing toolbox. Use it to connect with readers, build a platform, and market your book by being social. Tackle one platform at a time. For me, it’s LinkedIn. Don’t let the many social platforms scare you. Find ways to use them to your advantage to benefit yourself and your book. Hint: share parts of your book and your writing story. - You’re looking for fame and fortune. Yes, bring it on!
Most authors don’t become millionaires from their books alone. We recommend planning to build a community, find speaking engagements, create webinars, or start a mastermind. Do something with your book. Fiction or nonfiction, having a community is what makes it all worthwhile. Not the💲and 🪙. - You REALLY want your cousin in design school to do your cover. 🏫 He’s so talented!
Book covers are vital for attracting the right readers. They also say something about you and your professionalism. Invest in a professional designer who understands book cover trends and marketing psychology. And let your cousin help with your final choice.
Read my blog post, The Cover of Your Book Speaks Volumes, where I show you what makes a good book cover. - You think your aunt, who was an English teacher once, can edit it. 👩🏫
After twenty years of working in the book business, I can tell you professional book editing requires specialized knowledge of current publishing standards, genre expectations, and market trends. Your aunt may be a great proofreader, but having a professional editor will help refine your work and improve your book’s overall quality and readability. - You don’t read yourself, but others will read your book; it’s just that good. 📔
Stephen King said it best: “If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.” I suggest you make time to read and then analyze successful books in your field to understand how to make your book stand out.
- You know your colleagues will buy a dozen copies and hand them out. 📚 Of course, they will!
Oh sure, we’ll all do that (NOT.) Don’t offload YOUR responsibility of marketing your book to your colleagues.
- You think you can do the page design and layout yourself; how hard can it be? 🤨
Book layout and design are specialized skills. As with the interior design of your book, your cover will significantly impact readability and professional appearance. We have fought against this for many years. Authors who do not have professionally designed interiors and covers risk losing audience attention, and they make the Indie publishing world look bad. Please invest in professional typesetting and layout to achieve a polished, professional result.
Here’s a blog post about ragged right for interior design that Tom wrote. If you don’t know what ragged right is, read the blog post – Still No Justification for Justified Page Layout. This is what professional design does for you. - You know podcasters will find you by magic and invite you to their show. 🪄
Pitching yourself to podcasts, blogs, and other media outlets is your job. It’s not magic. If you wait around to be ‘discovered,’ you’ll get stuck in a time warp watching your eyelashes fall out. We advise creating a media kit, practicing your talking points, and listening to some podcasts before marketing yourself to podcasters. - You are pretty sure no one would read a book you wrote. You aren’t that special, after all. ✍️
It’s for sure no one will read your book if you don’t write it. However, if you do write it, there may be thousands of people who will read it. More than just your Mom and your cousin (he seems to want a stake in your book, somehow). People want variety. They want more than one voice to help them and advise them. By not writing your book, you give your power to other people who are writing a book. Why would you do that? - You know your family and friends will buy copies of the book and hand them out, and that will spark sales on Amazon for sure. 👩👧👦
One hopes your family and friends will be supportive, but they shouldn’t be your primary sales strategy. Start your marketing early. Have a plan! Don’t leave this to chance or fate; both reckless creatures you cannot depend on.
For further information on how to do this, read my blog post Don’t Watch While Your Book Flops! 5 Must-Do Marketing Tasks for Every Author and Every Book. - You know your local bookstore will grab your book and put it in the front window.
Well, well, well. You are to be applauded for your confidence. However, you need to build relationships with local bookstores before they will do anything for you and your book. Relationship building should be at the top of your marketing plan. - You don’t think anyone reads eBooks or listens to audiobooks so you won’t bother to make those. 🎧
eBooks and audiobooks are capturing significant market share today. Do not ignore this audience! - You’re pricing your book at $59 because your book is worth it! Nothing less will do! 💸
Really? For a 150-page business book? Do some market research before you choose a price. Overpricing can severely limit sales. How much is your competition charging? (Not $59, I bet.) - You don’t need a plan for marketing and promotion. Your book will sell itself.
Smart authors understand marketing and promotion. Your marketing plan should include social media, author events, media outreach, and even email marketing. Your book’s success depends on you getting it in front of readers. - You think readers and reviews are free – if the book is good enough, people will find it, read it, and review it. It’s what people do, right? 💻
Reviews are sometimes very hard to get. Even your closest fans will fail to review your book if you don’t nudge them to. Sometimes more than once. Asking for reviews is tricky – don’t ask for a ‘good’ review. Just ask for a review. Say please and thank you. Do it more than once. People get busy and forget. Be in their face just a little bit. It works. And yes, you can work with paid reviewers. That’s how reviews are in the popular magazines and news sites. People are paid to review them. These are editorial reviews and show up in a separate space on your Amazon page. - You aren’t into this storytelling stuff. Your book isn’t about stories; it’s about telling people how great you are and how they can be, too, if they listen to you. Stories are for children. 🌟
Stories and narratives are the lifeblood of human existence. People connect better to stories with a purpose than they do to data-only content. Write them a ballet. Write a symphony. Be unique. Be you. Learn how by working with a storyteller coach like Chloe DiVita, Your Story Choreographer. - You are absolutely sure your book is going to rock the world all the way into infinity. It’s that good. Your cousin told you so. 🧔♂️
I would like to talk to your cousin, please. First, he wants to get you a cover designer, and now he thinks the book is so good it’s going to knock Mel Robbins off the top of Amazon rankings. Your cousin needs to come down to earth, and so do you. Your book probably is or can be that good, but books that rock the world are supported by a good marketing plan. - You think independent bookstores are a waste of time. It has to be Barnes & Noble, right up front, where everyone can see it. 😍
Independent bookstores might sell more copies of your book than a giant store like B&N. Your book might make their window by building a good relationship with the owner. These bookstores should become your best friend before and after your book is done. - You are going to put together the last 25 blog posts you wrote and turn those into a book. People will get it; you know they will. Those blog posts are so good! 🎆
Did your cousin tell you they were that good? I bet he did. While blog posts can be a great starting point, a book requires organizational structure, a flow – called a throughline – and expanded content. Blog posts without additional work and expanded content could result in a disjointed reading experience. Work with a book coach to organize those blog posts and advise you on the stories you need to tell.
And there you have it. Many of the reasons people say writing a book is not going to work for them this year. By the way, did you notice how many times marketing and sales were mentioned? Were you paying attention when the advice mentioned the author’s role in the success of their book?
I hope so. Because no one can make your book a success as well as you, yourself. All the help you bring on board—and I do think you should get help—will not work if you’re not a big part of it. Marketing a book is hard so don’t leave out even on little thing you can do to make it work for you.
Think it’s time to turn your thinking around and get serious about your book? DM me on LinkedIn and set up a time to chat. You have questions. I have answers.
They don’t call me the Book Whisperer for nothing. If you find these posts helpful, be sure to share them with friends. Remember, Good Things Come To Those Who Write.
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